Shut the Door on Self-Hatred and walk the path of self-love.
It’s difficult not to compare yourself to others. We all do it from time to time at work, school, with friends, and on social media. at work, school, with friends, and on social media. However, constantly assessing how you compare to others can have a significant impact on your mental health and self-esteem. “I’ll never look like Marissa,” for example, can quickly turn into “I’ll never be good enough for anyone.” Before you know it, simply looking in the mirror can trigger feelings of self-hatred and frustration. If you already have a mental health condition, such as anxiety or depression, these feelings can be especially distressing.
You’re experiencing self-hatred when you see your life as a list of ultimatums, most of them resulting in catastrophe. You don’t feel like you’re good enough to be around friends or apply for new jobs. Instead of “I feel like a failure,” you think, “I am a failure.” These intrusive and negative thoughts can become very overwhelming and cause you to feel even worse
The road to self-love.
1. Be aware of your triggers.
Understanding the source of any problem is the first step toward resolving it.
If you’re struggling with self-hatred, sitting with the feeling and journaling can help you identify where it came from. Try sitting down at the end of the day and walking through your day mentally to take a look at what you did that made you feel bad about yourself.
- What you did
- how you felt during different activities
- who you were with throughout the day
If you don’t feel comfortable writing, you can also use audio or video recording tools to help you process your day more effectively.
2. Challenge your negative thoughts.
When you are unable to journal or reflect, self-hatred can arise. When this happens, try having an internal conversation with yourself. For example, if you think, “I hate myself,” it can be beneficial to immediately ask, “Why?” If the answer is, “I look ugly in this dress,” or “I really messed up that meeting,” try challenging that thought as well. “That’s not true,” you say to yourself. Consider why this negative thought is incorrect.
3. Engage in positive self-talk.
Love is a strong emotion that’s hard to feel toward yourself at a low point. If you’re feeling self-hatred, try writing out a list of things you love about yourself. Keep this list where you’ll see it every day, and say out loud one of the items from your list.
4. Surround yourself with people who make you happy.
Self-hatred can make you feel like you don’t deserve to be around your friends or family. Connecting with others is a huge part of our mental well-being. The best way to combat negative thoughts is to spend time with our loved ones, whether that’s a friend, family member, or partner.
7. Ask for help.
If you’re struggling with self-hatred or negative self-talk, there’s no shame in asking for help. Remember, you’re never alone – seek help from a professional if you need it.
